Funny Jack

Jack says and does some of the funniest things sometimes. I always think I need to write them down or record them in some way so we don't forget. Here are a few things that have really made us laugh lately. I'm not sure they'll come across as funny in writing as they do when he actually says them, but I'll try.
-Paul almost always gets Jack out of bed in the morning before he leaves for work while I'm feeding the babies. Sometimes though Jack has to wait for Daddy to get out of the shower so he sits in bed for a while. If he get's impatient he'll often start "crying". One such morning Paul went in and Jack immediately had a smile on his face and said "Daddy, I say ahh ahh so you come get me." Turns out his morning "crying" is just a ploy to get one of us to come get him out of bed. He said the same thing to me a few days later after nap time.
-For a while Jack had a list he would consult before he made any decision or answered any questions. It was a small piece of rolled up contact paper. He carried it around for days and if he was asked to do something or asked a question or anything he'd say "Let me check my list" and he'd unroll the paper look it it intently and then announce what the list said. Thankfully the list almost always lined up with what Mommy and Daddy wanted.
-Jack has been struggling with some of the difficult aspects of the English language lately. Especially things like when to use me and you or he and she. He's figuring out he and she as the explanation for that is simpler than the one for when to use me and you. The conversations we've had trying to explain me and you to Jack have been quite hysterical, sort of following the "Who's On First" comedy routine. For instance, Jack when you talk about you, you say me. When you talk about me (mommy) you say, you. He often says "help you". When I say "Jack do you need help?" he says "yes, help you". I say "Jack if you need help say, help me". Jack says "Help Mommy?".
-I'll finish with this story for now, though he does and says much more that cracks us up. Jack loves to talk on the phone. I usually let him talk to my mom if we talk during the day. Once I let him do that he decided he needs to talk on the phone every time it rings. So sometimes I let him talk even after the other person has hung up. Somewhere along the line he started ending his conversations by saying "Happy Birthday!". I have no idea where that came from but he's very excited to tell everyone happy birthday.